Eastern European Muslim

I have always talked about my life but not in detail. I come from a small community where everyone knows each other and I didn't want to add to what people created for themselves of negative reputation. I also considered family members who don't deserve to have a negative picture about their important person. Somehow I also hoped things would eventually be solved, now that the requirements are considerably lower.  Unfortunately it hasn't become better. What happened was only that I understood that even though blessed, if I want to take steps forward (and I do), not only to survive, I need monthly, regular contributions from my ex-husband with the expenses of the children. And not only that I need it. I feel I don't have the right to remit it, to not to ask for it, to give up their rights because it's not mine. It's theirs. Everything is negotiable, the amount, how often he sends it, I can wait, I can solve everything for the time being, but the fact ...

I was going towards the hospital. Enjoyed the view, again after 3 weeks of how the season was changing. Not “having to” go to places makes them more beautiful, or rather you are more able to appreciate their beauty. And then, suddenly, the thought. I left the bloodform at home. I can’t go back, I wouldn’t make it to my appointment. I started to talk negatively to myself, like why I have forgotten it - something nonsense, to forget is actually the absence of reasoning. Then I thought, so what? Really, what will happen if I go there without the bloodform? They will make another one. This is a place where people are focussed on the solution, not the problem or the cause of the problem. They look forward, not backward - especially in situations like people under strong medicines forgetting things, which is quite predictable. So I started to do the same. I allowed myself to forget things. To be a human (in Arabic “insan” (human) has the same root as “yansa” (forget)), especially...